Foxes and Nonnas

I watched the movie Nonnas on Netflix this past weekend. And I cried! It reminded of my Italian heritage; my dad and his death; my grandma; my great grandma; and my Nonna, my great, great grandmother who I have never met but whom my grandma adored. And it made me think of life and death. After my dad’s death, I am no longer afraid of dying. Through Adoration at church, I found peace with my cancer diagnosis and my eventual death, whether it is from cancer or something else, and through my dad’s death, my fear went away completely. I know that he, my grandpa and my crazy (in a fun way!) Italian grandma and her family will be Up There to welcome me. But the movie did make me think of life when the older generation, the one you think will always be there to guide you and give you advice, is no longer there. It made me think of keeping my family members’ legacies alive and how to do that. It made me think of my own death and what I want my legacy to look like. And it made me think that it is time to take a weekend to do something I have put off since my cancer diagnosis back in 2015: Get my affairs in order. We have a will, and I have an Advanced Directive, but I want to leave certain people certain things, have all my passwords in one place and have a binder of things prepared for my family when I die. Cancer makes you think about death. And cancer made me think about death every single day for the past 10 years at least once a day. It kind of holds you prisoner like that. But the little fox set me free, even though I’m the one who actually set him free back into his habitat. I have been set free of cancer and just want to appreciate life and live life, just like the little fox is doing back with his mom and sibling. I hope his swimming pool escapade is a distant memory for him, like a bad dream, just like I hope that cancer will be a distant memory for me some day. I remember the previous generation of kits, the ones last year (that unfortunately got hit by cars), and I love this new generation of little foxes, and I wonder if they’ll have their own little kits next year. It makes me think about the circle of life. And death doesn’t seem so scary anymore. I want to really LIVE while I am on this earth, and, ironically, cancer has taught me to do that. I keep this blog so that others can learn that lesson without having to go through cancer or so that they can learn to do that along their own cancer journeys. So, I’ve learned a lot from movies and from wildlife this past week, the good stuff in life! Now, I just have to make it till Wicked 2 comes out in November! Going to hopefully see that with my aunt, cousins and sister, making more good memories, which is what life is all about! Stay safe and healthy, everyone!